I gotta hand it to Mike Lindell. What is being called “his most bonkers claim yet” is actually really very brilliant. He has accidentally solved the problem of unemployment in the U.S. and dramatically reduces our dependence on foreign oil for the next 150 years or even longer.
Of course, there won’t be a country after about five or ten years due to the complete socio-economic collapse that would result from his claim being carried out, and the country would be weakened so much that it would be ripe for invasion, and we’ll have to do away with pesky things like child labor laws, child protection laws, unions, etc. But hey, at least he will have saved it from the rampant voter fraud that so obviously happened.
What is his bonkers but brilliant accidental solution to unemployment and importing oil? From his interview on Tuesday on the Real America’s Voice news channel:
“It’s so amazing, all the things that we have. We have all the pieces of the puzzle. You talk about evidence. We have enough evidence to put everyone in prison for life, 300 and some million people, we have that back all the way to November and December.”
That’s right. He’s got concrete evidence of criminal activity for the last two months (or 14 months if he means Nov/Dec 2020) that is going to put about 91% of the U.S. population in jail. Based on the 2020 census, if we go with an even 300 million, that leaves 31,449,281 people to guard the criminals. A one-to-ten ratio of guards to prisoners should be good. They can handle that.
But before we can guard them, we have to build a boatload more prisons. We can get a head start by converting all hotels and motels because no one will be staying in them any more. Remember, they’re going to be in prison for life and everyone else will be too busy guarding them.
The one down the street has 146 rooms. Other hotels should have about the same number. For the rest of what’s needed, I’m sure these despicable people that committed voter fraud won’t mind being conscripted so they can build the prisons they’ll be staying in.
Oh, wait a second. If we’re using a 1:10 ratio of guards to prisoners, that uses up all 31.5 million available people that aren’t in jail. Who’s going to grow the food to feed the guards and the prisoners?
Um, okay. Cut the number of guards by half. 1:20 ratio. 15.8 million should be enough to grow food for the entire country. Since the only people driving will be the guards as they go to and from work, that wipes out a lot of the oil we’ll need from other countries, so maybe what we produce locally will be enough for our gasoline and diesel needs.
Dang it! I forgot about oil refineries. How many people do we need to allocate to keeping those running? Ah, nuts. Power plants. And tool manufacturing. And electronics manufacturing. Sheesh. What else am I forgetting? IT staff for internet, LANs and WANs. Uniforms and other clothing for guards and prisoners. Gah!
Okay, new plan. A 1:50 ratio. 6 million for guards, 25.5 million for everything else. Better make sure we shut down all entertainment industries so we’re not short-changing any areas that we actually need. Somebody tell Regal, AMC, Disney, Universal Studios, Knott’s Berry Farm, etc., and all sports teams to shut down their businesses and venues. The whole kit and kaboodle. Go dark, now.
We better shut down lotteries and casinos, too. Can’t have people winning enough money so they can quit their job. We need all hands on deck.
Are we good? Good. Right.
Just exactly who will be going to jail once we get everything ready? Obviously, all people who voted for Joe Biden. They’re a part of the massive voter fraud. That’s a given. That’s 81.3 million, leaving 218.7 million criminals to be rounded up.
There were 168.3 million registered voters in 2020, but only 155.5 million voted. The 12.8 million that didn’t vote have to go to jail because they had the chance and couldn’t be arsed. That leaves 205.9 million criminals unaccounted for.
We can’t send people who voted for Donald Trump to jail. They did the right thing. They didn’t commit voter fraud. Now we’re down to 131.7 million. But we just ran out of voters. How’d that happen?
Hmm. Mike Lindell says that at least 300 million people are going to jail because of voter fraud. So I guess we have to start throwing ineligible voters in jail, which includes children, to reach that total? Am I getting this right? Neither group was eligible to vote but 300 million are going to jail. Looks like it. The math checks out. Okie dokie. Get on the bus, kids. You’re going on an extended field trip to see what life in prison looks like.
That’s a whole lotta people that are not going to be working any more and not having an income any more. Everybody better start tightening their belts because with that steep a reduction in taxes being collected, state and local governments and the federal government will have to cut services to the core.
I suppose we can shut down most of the family birth centers and save money that way. If we have separate prisons for men and women, then most of the pregnancies in the nation will just be among the guards and those not working in prisons, plus the occasional in-prison pregnancies that are bound to happen due to fraternization and abuse of power.
Anyone know how many decades it will take to rebuild the population of the US? The ones that are in jail are going to be there for the rest of their life, so somewhere around the year 2121, all or most of the prisoners will have died. We can just write off those 300 million now.
No, we can’t shut down the birthing centers. We’re depending on the 31.4 million people not in jail to get the population back to 331.4 million.
Boy, how do we do that? Use Dr. Strangelove’s suggestion of a 10:1 female-to-male ratio for selecting who doesn’t go to prison in the initial jailing? Put The Handmaid’s Tale into practice?
Whoof. Man, sometimes the cure for a problem that doesn’t exist really is worse than what it is supposedly trying to fix.
