Well, Michael Gross was probably busy making Tremors 5: Bloodlines. That got released today on home video…
Why yes, I would love to discuss my Medicare enrollment with somebody using an email address from accessoryboat.net!
1 Like
Seems legit. Might get better advice than some of the real people out there.
This is not how you start a letter. You start with Dear Sir/Madam.
I was surprised, yes. I’ve not seen this kind of spam mail in forever! It brought back such memories!
Ah, you remembered you have a child. Well done!
Sorry, I had to do this. It was too funny not to.
6 Likes
Bravo, my friend, bravo and encore.
via emea01-db3-obe.outbound.protection.outlook.com
to Recipients
We are Located in the United States of American offering loans of any kind @ 2% Contact us now if you are interested in getting your financial
And where is the United States of American located? Getting my financial what?
And no, I am not going to have the slightest iota of discussion of my finances with a company named “conradohofmannloancompany07@yahoo.com”.
The best dressing for word salad is the blood of scammers, lightly seasoned with the scammer’s tears of horror.
Right next to Canadia.
3 Likes
Hello Force10,
I found your profile on LinkedIn and wanted to ask for just 10 minutes on the
phone. I believe you’ll be interested in our all-flash enterprise storage
solution. We’ve broken the price barrier, which make us the most
cost-effective, all-flash SAN storage array on the market today.
My name is $Salesdroid, with Kaminario. What you’ll find about our storage is
that its design is years ahead of the market. It’s optimized for the highest
cost-effectiveness, while also providing consistent performance and scalability
across any workload in any environment.
In fact, with Kaminario, you’ll never be forced to compromise on performance,
reliability, or flexibility. You can scale-up by adding capacity, or scale-out
to increase both capacity and performance – allowing storage to easily expand
with your business at an average price of $1/GB usable.
Force10, Kaminario’s all-flash SAN storage solution is light years ahead of the
competition in design, price and performance. Please give me just 10 minutes to
discuss how we might help you and your company.
Sincerely,
$Salesdroid
If you got my email address from LinkedIn you obviously didn’t look at my profile. If you had, you’d have realized I’m at least two levels down from anyone who would make that kind of decision. Now GTFO.
I’m getting really sick of fake LinkedIn “message alerts” or “invites”. One of the reasons I decided long ago not to ever use LinkedIn.
1 Like
I’ve gotten deluged with ‘job opportunities’ that are insurance sales jobs since I’ve started actively looking. My last ‘sales’ related job was working at a pet store nearly 20 years ago.
Also, my wife has threatened to leave me as her ex tried selling insurance as a slight twist on ‘sitting around unemployed’ and she doesn’t want to deal with that again. So even if I was considering a commision-based reason to drive all my friends off by pushing insurance, that’s another reason to avoid the offer…
1 Like
You’re not the only one getting deluged with those. I actually had one call me and say, “We’d like to schedule your training for your new job duties.” My response was, “Thank you, but as an introverted computer geek, I really don’t think that a sales position would be a good fit for me.”
3 Likes
According to some acquaintances, those are the only jobs actually available on Monster.
AUSTRALIAN LOTTERY PROGRAMS
HEADQUARTERS UNIT 24 HIGHER
AVENUE HARRIS PARK GRANVILLA
NSW 0152 SYDNEY
AUSTRALIA
Dear Lucky Winner,
This email address has brought you an unexpected luck. We happily announce to you the result of the Australian International Lottery annual final draws held on the (27th of October 2015) by Australian International Lottery
And this email has brought to you a suggestions to not being using a crappily translator.
Actually, read that back in an Aussie accent, I’d buy it.
Not that address formatting though. That’s just wrong.
They don’t even have the postcode right. 
I Liliane authenticate this email, you can read about me on:
Liliane Bettencourt - Wikipedia I write to you
because I intend to give to you a portion of my Net-worth which
I have been banking. I want to cede it out as gift hoping it
would be of help to you and others too. Respond for confirmation.
With love,
Liliane Bettencourt.
You’d think she could afford a real email address.
1 Like
We are writing to you from WILLIAMS CLINTON LAW FIRM
wow. Just… wow.
(edited to remove special characters)
Penis extensions? What, like hair extensions? You just… what, clip them on or something?
1 Like
Your first payment of $5000.00 has been sent today via western
union. You are advise to Contact western union office with your full
information to enable them give you Sender Name, Question and Answer
to pick up your First $5000 MTCN= (####-###-###) sender name (xxxxxxxx)
You realize that Western Union transfers can be tracked online, right? Could you please at least attempt to be clever?
Tip of the day: if you’re going to try and get people to download a virus via a link you e-mailed them, don’t use the direct URL so that people can see it when they hover the mouse over the link. I know the people you’re hoping to hook are dumb, but TRY to be a little smarter than that. It took me five seconds to think of a way to achieve the same result that would make it look more legitimate and hide what you’re trying to do at the same time.
2 Likes