Say the entire MCSE manual six times, and re-read @ToasterFairy’s Bitching Hour thread.
Dog will forgive you, my son.
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Google needs to shut down the comments section of Youtube. It serves no positive purpose.
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Or at least apply stricter rules, such as the requirement for complete and grammatically correct sentence structure, spelling, and lack of profanity. That would weed out most of the users.
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I’ve seen some good comments out there, but I only really read them on obscure music videos so there’s that.
Shipping labels should include the recipient’s phone number automatically.
And now for something completely different:
I’ve seen variations on
ZOMG LOL Me too! tee hee
or
████ you and your ████ ████ mother! You █████ ████ ████ your sister! I’m going to come over and █████ you in █████ ████ and ████ you ████ until you’re my █████ █████! LOL teehee
It’s the
that makes that so much worse/funnier…
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I keep hearing about people “paying it forward” in the line at Starbuck’s. I think that if you really want to make a difference, it would be better to put that $5 towards the person’s bill behind you at say, the grocery store. If you’re buying Starbuck’s coffee, odds are good that you’re not really in need of the handout.
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I do it at McDonald’s in the drive through.
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That makes more sense to me than Starbuck’s too. 
Random musings about language:
The modern English language needs to strip itself of the letters C and X, and bring back the letters Þ and Ð.
C can be replaced by S or K, with the ch sound being replaced with tsh or a Polski-esque šh.
X can be replaced by Z or KS, depending on use: zylophone, eksray.
Thorn and Eth would resume their uses, replacing hard and soft th.
Oh, and you could also use ŋ to condense ng together… me likey!
[/derailment]
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Sorry, but you can’t derail a random musings thread with random musings 
On a separate, random note:
If my name was John Grey I would have to open a poker shop and call it J Grey Pokery.
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There was a conversation ahead of my musing, though 
I am a courteous Forum Lurker (with a plus seven Keyboard of Comfort)
In the same vein as your poker hall, I would open an “exotic dance hall” which only accepts goods trade instead of currency. I’d call it — wait for it — Tit For Tat.
I wanted to name my daughter Robin so she’d be Robin Wood.
We should replace letters because why? We have a world full of people who already fuck up English, don’t know that we need to change the alphabet to make it worse.
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Oh, I also want to completely re-do the language too. Mostly phonetic-to-written adjustments, especially to cure things like the b in doubt, the s in island, all those stupid little bits that scholars put into words in order to make literature both harder to learn (got to keep those working-class oiks away from our precious words, what-what old boy!) and to try to show the root of the word in the word itself. Which is how island got its s… because Latin… or something (I chose this as a perfect example because the s in island has nothing to do with Latin, we were just told it did for about 400 years)… 
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I don’t know about Latin, but in the provincially debased dialect of it that I know (Spanish), the word for island is “isla” and you do pronounce the “s”. How it got into English and became silent is another matter entirely.
Isla in Spanish is the same as Isle in Modern English.
Island comes from īegland (eigh-land, with the eigh- said like eye, because Norse) and the S was put in because it was assumed by scholars in the 1700s that it was from the Latin root, the same as Isla. Because making things more Latin made them more English 
Especially when you’re trying to create Modern English out of Old English, Scots, all three Gaelics, Ynglis (Borders English), Norse, French and German…
Preaching to the choir, man. This is one thing I do with practically every language I create. I’ve even created two different forms of y, to reflect the differences in usage.
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I don’t get it 
[quote=“ClockWorkXon, post:1144, topic:478, full:true”]I’ve even created two different forms of y, to reflect the differences in usage.
[/quote]
Ah, the coveted ÿ… totally unnecessary but brilliant to watch people attempt to understand what noise is demanded from them.
Then how would you write “yellow”?
ETA: I would love it if we could get rid of the stupid “Qu” idiocy. I have no idea how that even came about in Latin.