It always has been me, and always will be me 
So rather than blaming Techno, we can blame you now?
The example given in my documentation is only an example. Yes, it references an old server. No, I wonât be changing it for the sake of changing it. As with any documentation of this nature, thereâs an implicit assumption that you know the correct server name to substitute into the example to make it work for you.
WaitâŚthis is wish you could say? I really did.
Whose idea was it to set the thermostat to start heating at 74 degrees and not start cooling until 80?! Have some consideration for the other people in the office insert rude name here.
I sent an e-mail to the entire company last week regarding the error message people were getting when accessing $website. This e-mail included instructions on how to access the site without getting errors. Why are you still complaining that it doesnât work?! Read your %@#$ e-mail!
Iâve had to connect to four computers this morning to follow the instructions in the e-mail for the luser. My staff has had to do at least that many each. Lusers. 
Youâre all a bunch of fucking idiots.
I had that with a luser yesterday.
(Background: the Android phones we are using donât like Exchange 2003 very much, and frequently stop syncing. The only fix is to delete and recreate the account on the phone.)
So this luser emails me to say that heâs havening problems with his phone syncening emails, and has followed the self-help instructions but it didnât work and now he has no contacts.
What I wished I could say was âLook mate, itâs not my fault you canât follow instructions. Plenty of other people have used this document and gotten themselves back up and running without any further help.â
Mutter mumble grumble.
Why? Couldnât you just say âRefer to my email dated ⌠and follow the instructions there. People who are too stupid to do so probably shouldnât be working hereâ
Okay, maybe not include that last bit ;), but I canât imagine itâs that difficult to follow instructions.
Oh, I referred them to the e-mail, but in the interest of âcustomer serviceâ explained it to them as well. Most of them happily admit that they never read e-mails from IT. Like itâs something to be proud of. grrrr
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Background: My company is pretty independent, but was bought some years ago by another major organization. For a few things, we have to go through their helpdesk for assistance. They recently updated our voicemail system to unified messaging and the timestamp is off by three hours. I submitted a ticket to get this fixed, and this is the response I got.
The voicemai ltime works off where the server is. This is not changable.
What do you mean? Not âchangableâ? You canât adjust for location?
Actually, this does make sense to me, for a few reasons:
- How do they determine (with any certainty) where a phone number is located? I mean, you could manually enter it, but then you have to maintain it.
- Dealing with timezones can be a pain in the @$$. until 2008, SQL Server didnât have a data type for date + time + timezone offset so you had to store them separately, or normalize everything to one timezone for storage and convert at the application layer. Coincidentally enough, I just spent an hour playing with said data type andâŚyeeeech. It took quite a few mental gymnastics maneuvers to get data into and out of that field the way I want it. Granted, part of it was my own lack of experience with the subject (and in hindsight what I ended up with makes sense), but stillâŚit can get icky.
-
GetDate()is just too convenient to not use in your SQL
- Even if youâre handling the timezone right and storing the timestamp with the correct offset (in my case, coercing everything to be UTC-based), youâre back to location. Do you give the listener their local time? The callerâs local time? And how do you figure that location out? What if youâre coded in the system as being on the west coast, but youâre on a trip to Chicago and dial into the voicemail. What time would you hear then?
Dammit, everyone needs to just get on UTC! And I know @Lee_Ars agrees with me.
Why canât you make your gorram SCCM servers work properly? The ones at my old job were like a well oiled machine. With these ones I have to run the install and pray it doesnât error out, if the machine even gets the advertisements in the first place. Plz to be fixing this. Thanks.
If we get another virus that takes the whole server farm down one more time, maybe itâs time we take email away from some people.
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Gettinâ reaaaaaaal tired of your $#!7
Iâd fight will shatter.
That sentence doesnât make any sense. 
Maybe he misplaced an ânâ.
Maybe itâs one of Billâs distant relatives. On the incontinent side of the family.
So you moved us to a different office. Great, this one isnât out in the middle of everything. But there is no cell reception in here. You just took away our primary method of contacting the end user. Awesome. Pigfuckers.
No cell service? Canât contact the users? Youâre sitting on a gold mine, Trebek!
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