Your Honor, there is NO WAY you did not know that the defendant’s legal status was that of a corporation, and therefore cannot be represented by anyone other than an attorney. It is ridiculous that you are again continuing this case for a month. You had two other hearings to bring this up. None of us here are legal experts, and would have no way to know that, but you are and do.
What I said: Ok, I will be here on June 24th!
Remember to apply to the bum too (a la Home Alone 3)
Sounds like fun.
Dear $Mangler
What is it with you? I have told you, my Bossly Unit have told you time and again, just exactly what we need.
Now you have decided we need a new Barracuda appliance, to enable us to initiate a VPN tunnel between here and there.
What about the rest of the kit? Users are abusing the network/internet and there’s zippo we can do about that.
Oh wait, I can probably install pfSense/Smoothwall on a box and use that, but then you’ll have a hissy fit.
And, on top of that, our server’s starting to creak. Seriously. I cannot even give you a guarantee that it will be up next month, it is 5 years old by now (hardware). Systeminfo returned this :
Original Install Date: 7/21/2010, 3:04:02 PM
And it’s Server 2k3.
Seri-assly.
Meh.
I’m outta here the first chance I get.
Some friends of mine and I used to call that Server Y2K.
Dear $Manglement
In your finite wisdom you (or somebody) have decided to relocate the video conferencing system to $some_other_fscking_place
Without checking if it’s OK with IT
Without making sure about bandwidth
Without making sure about how you go to connect the VC system to the Internets.
Guess what.
Last time I worked during my leave, I did not get paid for that, although I submitted an overtime request. Then you guys got all clever and said I had to submit an approval for overtime before the time.
AND (drum roll)
I’m on leave for Monday and Tuesday next week. Which, incidentally, is when the conference is to be.
I will NOT work during my leave, and will tell you where to go in a polite way.
kthanxbai.
I can unlock your account and help you get logged in, but I can’t remember your password for you.
Figure it out yourself.
I notice that you said “can”, not “will”.
Chill out, dude. The guy is only having problems with a couple of links on the signature block. It’s not like suddenly everything started failing for him. No need for you to barge into my office looking grim and sounding like a major problem just dropped on your lap.
Dear $project damager
Procrastination will NOT save the day.
I informed you three months ago, then a month ago about a specific PC who needs its hard drive repaired. Yet you faffed around doing nothing.
Only when I CC’d the client in last month did the client start jumping up and down to get your attention.
I’m so out of here the first opportunity I get.
Dear $Cow-orkers
Just what for did you three guys left your laptops behind, unwatched, in the open, on $damager’s bakkie (small truck) and not inside the cab whilst ALL three of you went for a bite of something to eat at a fuel station?
Why didn’t somebody remained behind to keep an eye on things?
**ck you lot. I’m pretty pissed off right now. You know that in South Africa you don’t leave laptops and other valuables lying around in the open, you either take it with you, or have somebody watch the vehicle.
****. R25k of equipment gone.
Yeah right. Sod off please.
I’m not sure where you’d have to be for that to be even 90% safe.
This just in.
Apparently their passports also got blagged. And personal equipment too.
Aw shame.
Stupid should hurt. And that identity theft is going to hurt them for a long, long time.
You know, I’m a big slacker but I’d like to at least pretend we’re making decisions that make our customers happy.
Pet Peeves:
Since moving into a much larger building to join the rest of my coworkers, I have noticed that I see a lot of behavio(u)r 
that really bugs me.
Little things I know, but when you are trying to get places in the building and these things happen it makes life hard for the rest of us.
All of those apply to sidewalks as well, and it really drives me up a wall.
I actually kind of like the idea an office I was in briefly had to actually build some dedicated ‘phone booth’ rooms that had a seat, a small shelf, and could be used when privacy was needed to make a call. Still a bit visible, but better than trying to hide in the stairway.
This was, admittedly, also an office with a very open floorplan. Basically a bunch of long counters that the staff set their laptops on when they’re in the office.
We have a couple niches here and there with a couple chairs and a small table. No idea what they are really for but seriously personal conversations happen there, or outside.