Things you wish you could say (everywhere)

I kind of like that idea

I already have partitioned out in my head which people close to me get how much. Our grandmas will get enough to make sure they can have the best care possible - oneā€™s 93 and oneā€™s 88, so medical care is a big issue. Our parents will get a decent chunk so they too can have the care they will need when they age, as well as live out the rest of their lives not worrying about finances. Our brothers will get the next lowest chunk to be sure their kids can get great educations and not have to stress about things. And then we each get to pick one person/family to bless with a chunk - my bff will get it, since they get our kids if we both die. And because sheā€™s my bff and Iā€™d carry her baby, so whatā€™s a little money between friends? Even with incredibly generous amounts, thatā€™s only $10mm. Which would leave me like $100mm after taxes. And yes, all would transferred from my trust to their trusts. Not paying taxes on it twice!

Everyone who has my cell number gets 10k to just never ask me for money. Family gets house paid for, parents get taken care of. Grand kids get college funds. And it all goes into trusts for kids and grand kids with age banded payouts.

A million isnā€™t much to live on when you are 18, but a hundred grand at that point, and then another at graduation could make a huge difference, with the rest coming out at 25 or 30.

Better get that in writing, 'cause otherwise you KNOW some will keep coming back.

Donā€™t need it in writing, I just donā€™t have to feel bad telling them to pike off after that.

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Okay, here we go.

Before even showing up to get my winnings Iā€™ve picked up a new cell phone SIM card with a new number and transferred all of the names and numbers over. Iā€™ve contacted a lawyer and accountant and have them prepped on the situation and ready to advise me. I set up new email addresses for each individual contact. If I get email on that account from someone other than you, I know the reason. ALL OLD CONTACT POINTS ARE IGNORED. Until I contact you, you canā€™t find me.

Iā€™ve contacted a friend of mine who makes awesome pens and commissioned one especially for me, for all those cheques Iā€™m going to have to write. Also, a custom leather portfolio for my new pen and a tablet (yet to be determined) and a paper pad.

After showing up and getting the money in instalments, not in a lump sum, the Dragonlady and I go on vacation for a year. Like, right to a plane from the lottery office. Any paperwork can be handled by phone and fax and email from anywhere. We go completely off the grid.

The lawyer can handle selling the house and storing the contents. The accountant can handle taxes, etc. while weā€™re away.

A year is probably enough time to see how people really react. Iā€™ll give some money to immediate and extended family. Quite a lot, actually. Right away.

Then, upon our return, I can start to think about what to do with it all.

And whatā€™s your cell number? :sunglasses:

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uhā€¦ Eightā€¦ Sixā€¦ Sevenā€¦ Umā€¦ Fiveā€¦ Threeā€¦ Zerothā€¦ Ninerā€¦ ?

Totally not fake, really.

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Thatā€™s a plumbing company here.

Iā€™m gonna epoxy those eyeglasses to him so he doesnā€™t lose them again.

Actually said: Iā€™m gonna tape those eyeglasses to him so he doesnā€™t lose them again.

Staples might work, too. :wink:

Iā€™d use Stitches.

Iā€™m assuming him = dakson?

@Woodman, @RoadRunner, my initial thought was rivets but I thought that might be too much.

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Tack welding?

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You assume correctly

You can take your theory and shove it up your @ss, thatā€™s what I think. And guess what? When the alarm starts shooting off even more because of it, you can take your complaints and shove those up your @ss too.

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OpenOffice Wirter, STOP CHANGING THE WIDTHS OF THE TABLES IN THE DOCUMENT! Every time I open it back up, I have to keep setting the width back to where it was because you increase it by anywhere from .01 to .05 inches. This causes the border in the table to no longer line up with the right edge of the paragraphs above and below it.

And when I paste something into the document, stop applying the formatting from the previous paragraph. If I wanted what I pasted to be highlighted or italicized or bolded, I would have done that before I copied it.

Knock it off!

I really wish I hadnā€™t rolled my ankle this morning while walking Noodle.

Dear Apple;

Thanks for using teeny tiny PH000 screws in my laptop case. Theyā€™re slowly unscrewing themselves from the vibrations of my cooling pad (I play games on my Mac, which makes an active-powered cooling stand a necessity) and Iā€™ve already lost two of themā€¦